Meanwhile in Oregon

So after a grueling 3 months of working 9 1/2 hour days at a discount grocery store in Zurich, I earned enough money to return to Grover's outstretched paw. He has lost a lot of weight and seems to be attempting kittenhood, which I respect. He is keeping it real. Maybe he can't jump up onto things anymore, but he is very good at alerting those he trusts to carry him around. He is also still a master of burrowing, which should surprise no one. At night he doesn't want to stop the party and is displeased when I fall asleep. On my birthday he patted my hand and gave me a stern look that said, "my water dish is unhygienic, please replace it". It's his way of making sure my twenties will not be spent in a hovel. To best describe what Grover feels, I must quote Winston Churchill: "a man does what he must - in spite of personal consequences, in spite of obstacles and dangers and pressures - and that is the basis of all human morality".

Back in the Day

Grover and I had a wild first couple of years together. Our honeymoon phase, if you will. Looking back, I feel that this haze was mostly fueled by the fact that Grover and I were roughly the same size for that short period of time. This inspired me to make Grover my must-have household item. In turn, I was the only soul he could count on to share cat treats and feelings with. And so a friendship bound for greatness begun. Even though our sizes now differ greatly, Grover still sees me as his slightly-hands-on equal. He still gets really confused and nervous when I pick him up for a nightly jig, and often demands that I let him down.

Favorites

Grover has many favorites. In fact, playing favorites is his favorite hobby. I, being an observant bystander, have managed to record some of these elusive favorites:

Favorite Sentence: Grover!
Favorite Sound: Crunching
Favorite Water: Leftover after a shower
Favorite Dance: The slow waltz
Favorite Taste: Lightly seasoned salmon
Favorite Emotion: Expectant yet patient
Favorite Expression: Faint disdain
Favorite Quote: "There is no such thing as a good tax" -Winston Churchill
Favorite Book: Jane Eyre
Favorite Dress Code: Formal (tux)
Favorite Bedtime: 4 pm
Favorite Meal: Second midnight snack
Favorite Day of the Week: Monday
Favorite Human: Me, followed by the last person to serve him
Favorite Animal: Dog
Favorite Dessert: Cereal milk
Favorite Movie: The Terminal

Example of Favorite Expression:

Hats Off to You

If Winston Churchill and Gandhi had had a love child (and don't think they didn't), that child would have been Grover. Grover has the best of both worlds: he is an aristocrat, a great leader, modest, educated, and motivated by the need for independence and freedom. He has managed to become a friend of all in our household, which is no easy task: the other two cats that live with him, Scootles and Cutie (peasant names), are complicated and prone to moodiness, and the two dogs, Lucky and Jenny (see the pattern?), have their own set of problems, namely barking and rolling in horse manure. Yet Grover sees past these physical barriers into something much closer to the truth: he sees in their hearts the same thing he sees in his: the desire to be loved. What makes Grover rise above the rest is his ability to attain this love. The others have yet to stop complaining long enough to seek it.

Grover with Scootles and Cutie, though notably not Scootles and Cutie together.

Grover's Playlist, Part 5: Love

If Grover knows anything, it's a thing or two about love. He knows of the many forms and the ways in which one might express them. These songs are some of his favorite musical interpretations of love, which he enjoys listening to with a glass of red wine in front of a warm fireplace.

Blitzen Trapper - Laughing Lover, a soft and light take on the friendly side of love.

Bonaparte - Computer in Love, a somewhat cynical beat with an electric tone.

The Gossip - Love Long Distance, a sassy explanation of a relationship-killer that I, Grover and my boyfriend all managed to elude.

Booka Shade - Bad Love, despite (or because of) the title a quite dancey and idyllic tune.

Phoenix - Love Like a Sunset, a barely vocal song leaking with intensity, advising you to love all day every day.

Oh the Humanity!

Grover has once again managed to exude his power without the use of violence or harsh words. After 9 months apart, he first refused to look me in the eyes and sat limply in my arms, causing a slight panic. But, after some dancing, petting and singing, he was back on his feet and in power mode. He expressed this by following me around like a secret agent. He fought against battered joints and bad eyes to scoot up and down stairs, heave up onto my bed, and appear aloof. Our friendship was without a doubt back in the "on" position. He picked up some human traits such as drinking out of mugs and indulging in conversation, and I picked up some (more) cat traits such as being covered in cat hair. All in all a success.

Down in Togo as Narrated by Grover

So my good friend Basil just got back from two months in Togo. Apart from being slightly confused and talking to me in French (I don't understand French unless the sentence contains the word croissant), he had some valuable life lessons to share. Grover would explain these as follows: goats are fat, colors are everywhere, time doesn't exist, and yams are great. I will discuss these topics further when I see Grover in 10 days or so.

If Grover was a Human...

 If Grover was a human, his favorite words would be colossal, grievous and waggish. His favorite meal would be a dainty steak with roasted rosemary potatoes. His house would be decorated in the Italian Style. He would live in a metropolitan area in a neighborhood with several beautiful parks. His hobbies would include baking pastries, cleaning his bathtub, and using an expensive cell phone. He would be the CEO of an international company. He would have many high society friends but just as many middle-class acquaintances. He would drink red wine at dinner and scotch at parties. His type would be successful and confident. He would be 5'11" and wear suits without ties.  

Monogamy...More Like Grogamy

When I was little, I often imagined Grover with several impossibly tiny mini-Grovers around him. But Grover is fixed and, more importantly, doesn't care about romance. I have learned a lot from observing his social interactions: all he searches for is peace, friendship and respect. I am proud to say that my cat is special and he knows it. He is always satisfied with himself, and doesn't regret anything. I wonder how the human race would interact if sex didn't play a roll anymore...the world might end, and ideas for TV-Show storylines would get scarce. This problem would be solved if Grover was made a movie star.

Grover's alter ego-

Grover the Great

Grover is not just one example of a good cat, but actually the good cat to which every other cat is compared. Grover is a living legend. When I was 11 and lived out in the country, I spent every Friday night alone in the living room watching FRIENDS and eating ice cream with Grover. When I left for a year and came back, he feigned disinterest but followed me everywhere. When I was falling asleep in bed, he would come to the edge of my comforter and head-butt it until I let him under the covers, where he would set up his domain and scuttle around. 

"Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the lash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat." - Mark Twain

"There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats." - Albert Schweitzer

Nano Mania

There's this thing going on in Switzerland right now called "nano mania". One of the two largest grocery-turned everything stores in Switzerland is called Migros and has this new policy where for every 20 francs (20 dollars) that you spend, you get one nano. The point is really no point at all: the logo is "stapeln, purzeln, sammeln: die Nanos sind da" which means "stack, tumble, and collect: the nanos are here". And that's really all you can do with these one-inch tall plastic pill-shaped toys with weights in them. I suppose you can swallow them too, but a four-year-old already did that and it didn't sound like a lot of fun. And they're impossibly hard to stack; it took me a whole five minutes to get one on top of another, and I have yet to achieve a third. All I have to say is that if nano mania could be this successful, so could Grover mania. If only Grover was here...

Notables

 That's me. Some people tell me I have a wise soul.

 This is my boyfriend. He lives in a castle/hotel in eastern Switzerland. He also lives in Zurich part-time because he goes to college there. I live with him in both places because I have a ridiculous amount of free time and also he gives good hugs.
 

 That's Grover. He doesn't really need an introduction.